I’m going through perimenopause with pretty bad mood swings. I have three young kids who can unfortunately be the target of my impatience and irritability. I feel really guilty about it afterwards but find it so hard to control in the moment! Are there other moms here dealing with this, and how are you handling it??
-Kathy, Seattle
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Farzana6 years ago
Sure. We know how sometimes it gets tough. But the tougher it gets, the better we get.
Kathy6 years ago
Thanks so much for the support ❤️
Michelle Slater6 years ago
I have a teen with adhd/asd, I also have asd. Before lockdown I was a nightmare but since lockdown because I’m asthmatic I have improved, my partner does the shopping so I’m not standing in queues and having to negotiate supermarkets which I’ve always found difficult. If anything I’ve started to grow my own veg which gets me out and doing my own thing. I’ve only blown my stack twice and both times were when my teen was involved because he is struggling with lockdown
Kathy6 years ago
Hi Michelle, thank you so much for sharing. I can imagine that must be challenging! Happy to hear that you've found some respite during this time. Advice from others too seems to be I need to take time for myself. Love the idea of growing your own vegetables!
Swift6 years ago
I would like some advice on this also. In the middle of a pandemic and lockdown, peri menopausal, home schooling two ten year olds and a hormonal 12 year ol. Worried I’m going to ruin my relationship with them as I’m so up and down.
D J6 years ago
Just an idea when you are calmer and they are tell them that you love them and that you are sorry you get annoyed but that it’s your hormone Then tell them again to remember that you will always care and love them. In my situation I do the above and it works. Take care and be kind to yourselve you are doing your very best.
Kathyreplying to D J6 years ago
Hi Swift, I have the same worries as you! I appreciate you sharing, and I really appreciate the advice DJ. I'll make sure to share that with my kids today ?
Mumsmoodyreplying to D J5 years ago
Same here. The least little thing can seem so outrageous when I’m in one of my mood swings. I tell my kids I’m sorry all the time. I have told my two teenage boys to go and Google ‘menopause symptoms’ and they will understand why I’m so on edge sometimes. When I get snappy at my husband I apologize immediately and tell him I’m feeling hormonal. Or if I’m feeling really really hormonal I seclude myself and save the apologies for later. I remind them all how much I love them on my good days by doing extra for them. I may cook their favorite meals and maybe give my hubby a foot rub. I sometimes apologize in advance because I can feel the change coming. Lol. They know and understand, but I can tell I hurt them sometimes. It just kills me.
Ellie6 years ago
I hear you Kathy, l find spending some time on my own helps! Also exercising, baking even gardening ? l have been doing some research looking at foods that l can incorporate in to my diet. Natural plant based forms of the hormone oestrogen eg Tofu, Soy, Lentils hope this helps a bit ?
Kathy6 years ago
Thank you so much Ellie. I'd never even thought about food or diet changes for this problem, so that's a great tip! I'll do some research on that too. Please report back if you find the diet changes helpful
Anonymous6 years ago
I never suffered with mood swings around my periods, however at almost 47 and believing I am peri menopausal, I am noticing mood changes now. Especially with my anxiety around COVID... I just feel elevated with emotion at certain times of the month. I take my hat off to anyone with children, whilst trying to cope with your own emotions, dealing with COVID and home schooling and running your house . You people are amazing!!!
Kathy6 years ago
I am the same! I did not expect this effect on my mood at all but it helps knowing I'm not the only one
Moodymare206 years ago
Hello all.. I have had mood swings for many years although I take HRT now (in the last 6months) So don’t have as many now which is good, the thing is when it’s good it’s good but when it’s bad it’s very bad there seems to be no in between, or an even level. Somedays I felt like I was a bomb waiting to go off, so would take myself away from people/family for the fear of what I was going to say,even though they hadn’t spoke to me. I thought that no one wanted to spend time with me or just be with me, well why would they with someone who is grumpy and unpredictable lol ....luckily I have a great family who after a lot of tears and talking, sort of understand the meaning of menopause, I suggested to my husband to look up the symptoms of the menopause himself which helped us, sorry for long chat x
Kathy6 years ago
Hi Moodymare, I can relate so much about the extremes. Great that you've made so much progress with your family and have their support. I hope to get there too. Perhaps there needs to be a menopause app for husbands too! ?
Lois6 years ago
I experience mood swings and never know why and where they come from. I look back on them and think - whoa where did that come from. For me it’s about getting away from the person who is on the other end - a time out so to speak. My car has become a bit of a refuge.
Nia6 years ago
Yup I know this all to well. I am a 52 mom to three young ones. Twins that are five and a six year old so essentially I have triplets. Yes things are challenging. While I’m am grieving my youth, they do keep me young at heart and on my toes. However I have to constantly remind myself to be mindful when I’m feeling moody and that they are just children. These are especially trying times especially during COVID and we are all sheltered in. I’m working at home and managing their education upkeep. Trying not to be resentful of my husband whose routine has not changed one but during all of this. He’s out of the house from sun up until they are in bed during the week.
Anonymous6 years ago
I have always struggled with anxiety and low mood around my periods but now with peri-menopause my mood can completely change in the course of a day- it’s hard to predict and control and is having a negative effect on my family and marriage. Would HRT help with this aspect?
Katy6 years ago
Same here! 4 and 6 year old - I find I’m particularly impatient with my youngest, zero tolerance if I’m honest. I meditate for 20mins twice a day, I have done for over two years and I do believe this is helping a lot at the moment but clearly I’m not a saint so not 100% foolproof ?
Zoe6 years ago
Hi, i’m 32 and peri menopausal. i too am struggling with my mood. this past week has been particularly hard...i didn’t want to see anyone and my anxiety was through the roof. i have 3 young kids and husband at home. generally i'm ok and seem to be coping even with the current COVID situation, and i knew i was in a rut so trying to pick myself up out of it. unfortunately this doesn’t help you out much but just know you are not alone! and if you find something that helps plz let me know lol
Elle4 years ago
I’m 37 and have peri symptoms too. I find what helps me some of the time is 5 htp. I take 400mgs a day, spread out.
Anonymous4 years ago
I’m a total disaster, emotionally. I had a full on meltdown after my daughter said something critical of me ( she was joking but Bc of my mood I took it personally). I’m always overreacting.
Norea4 years ago
The fact that you said you feel guilty afterwards makes you a good mom. I am the same, I’m very impatient with my 7yo and irritable. I sometimes raise my voice and feel bad afterwards. I apologise to him later and explain that just because I’m an adult doesn’t mean that I’m perfect and that it was certainly not his fault. Adults feel stress, anger and sad too and that’s ok. That helps him cope with his own “negative” emotions as well which I think is healthy. Nobody should feel that they have to be chirpy happy and perfect all the time. That’s actually toxic
Anonymous3 years ago
I have been finding myself snapping very much on my husband and children a lot. When I have done it I feel really bad and then beat myself up over it.