This poll ran on the Caria community site and is now closed. The final results are below.
- Less than a year40.16%
- 1-2 years36.30%
- 3-4 years12.77%
- More than 4 years10.77%
Community comments
65Real experiences shared by the community, from the original discussion to today.
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Share what worked for you — comments are reviewed before they appear.
Frances5 years ago
I didn't have a clue I was going through the menopause. I was having severe panic attacks, health anxiety and what I now know was hot flushes. Thankfully my doctor identified straight away that it could be my hormones.
Adele5 years ago
Hi I have been going through this most of this year. My anxiety and panic attacks have got worse over the past month. Not sleeping have no appetite. Periods have been all over the place. Just don’t feel like myself. Just went to the doctors and wants to put me on antidepressants. I don’t want to go on them. I really don’t know what to do. Hate feeling like this.
Reginareplying to Adele5 years ago
I went on antidepressants. Prozac and Wellbutrin. No problems, only benefits, has been my experience with them.
Stacey5 years ago
Omg I’m having the exact same symptoms. You have a good doctor, I clearly need a new one. What suggestions did your doc give to alleviate your symptoms? Have they helped
Jenreplying to Stacey4 years ago
I am new to this. Just started experiencing symptoms. I’m not even sure it is menopause. Migraines, panic, anxiety, heart palpitations, flushing, night sweats. My doctors are treating without collaborating. Neuro wants me to take zonisamide, cardio gave me a beta blocker and getting a Holter monitor. Primary gave me muscle relaxers. I’m so confused and feeling hopeless.
Aliciareplying to Jen3 years ago
Similar. Very new to this. Periods still regular but experiencing panic attacks, heart palpitations and headaches. Dr ran me through a series of tests that all came back normal and gave me antidepressants, anti-anxiety and ordered a holter monitor. No one linking it to hormones yet but said I can contact my on/gyn for tests.
Margiereplying to Alicia2 years ago
I went online and ordered the Everlywell “Women’s Health Test” to check all my hormones. My test results were then presented in the app and it confirmed that I was in menopause. The nice thing is it tests other hormones too. My testosterone was normal, my cortisol was normal and the other areas were all normal. When I had my yearly check up with my doctor I printed a copy and gave it to her. It helped confirm that my estrogen was low and that my body was in menopause. From that point on I was able to accept the change and embrace it. Now I take one day at a time and use this great app. I journal, walk everyday and lift weights, eat healthy, no sugar or white flour. It truly is trying different things and tracking what works and what doesn’t and coming up with a routine that keeps you balanced.
Beth5 years ago
After my Divorce I started a relationship with a younger man that had grown children and mine were in a not so nice teen stage. I knew I didn’t want anymore children & He clearly stated from the beginning that he wasn’t going back to that stage. So, I myself feeling like a teenager again, lol, wasn’t even thinking of my age when I missed a period and was freaking out. I took 3 pregnancy tests, all negative, cried my eyes out and called my doctor. When she suggested menopause it hit me how I was old enough to be in menopause. Lol
Anon5 years ago
I didn’t take pregnancy tests because I’ve breastfed for years when my children were babies/small, and I’ve been on the contraceptive pill in the past, so I know that hormones can stop you from having periods. There was one time when we were on holiday in France and my period was super late due to stress (I think it might have been 2014) and I couldn’t identify what was causing my period to be late, even though I hadn’t been having much sex. So whilst we were on holiday I took a pregnancy test in France (it was negative). I don’t think that was menopause related as I was only 39 at the time. I think it was stress. I get stressed during the school holidays due to the change of routine...
Anon5 years ago
I started to have night sweats which I’ve never had before in my life, not during pregnancy or at any other time... My periods have always been a bit irregular, but the level of irregularity became more and more pronounced. I have missed periods in the past due to stress. There is definitely an important stress factor for me. However the overwhelming trend is that my periods were getting more and more irregular. At the end of 2018, start of 2019 my cycle length was alternating between long and short. The cycle length changes aren’t as pronounced as in someone in full menopause. I haven’t gone for months and months without a period, but I have gone for 40days... and I have missed periods. And I’ve had short cycle lengths of around 20 days too.
Mav5 years ago
It’s odd. But I realised straight away. I was 50 on the 26th December 2011. My periods had been a bit patchy. My first flush happened on the 2nd January. And it was down hill from there. Can I just say I love the winter months. I am hoping by summer, They will be gone. But I doubt it. 10 years and counting.
Shelley5 years ago
You can add a few more years to that, my mum’s 85 years young and still having them x
Jo5 years ago
My first signs were panic attacks, heart palpitations and freaky/missing periods! Then came the emotional bursts ? next the hot sweats that originally made me feel a bit sick, light headed and exhausted then the no periods, no sex drive, dryness, thinning hair, breast pain, insomnia, acid reflux, constant UTI’s, allergies to food and scents, swollen belly (always been flat) and finally the joint pain and forgetfulness- good fun this menopause hey ? got to laugh and actually the awakening of knowing that women are incredible warriors ? Thank goodness it is now something that is spoken openly about and this incredible app! I can’t imagine all the poor women over the years who have had to suffer in silence and some institutionalised due to their suffering. Yep, women are incredible ?
Summer5 years ago
I could have written this post! Are you still dealing with anxiety and panic? What has helped?
Missyreplying to Summer4 years ago
I take nerve tonic by hylands it helps tremendously with anxiety.
Shannon2 years ago
I can totally relate. Do you still get panic attacks? I do going on 3 years. It’s miserable.
Joanne1 year ago
Wow that’s me. I don’t know who to turn to as been told they don’t test for it now if you are at the age lol. My mum passed last year so don’t have her for the guidance I’m so badly needing at the moment. Or should I just make an appointment with the Dr. Which I’ll be very lucky to get this year
Angela5 years ago
I think my daughter’s traumatic birth triggered something in my body 2 half years ago now as that’s when I first noticed symptoms of Perimenopause. The odd missed period now and then just put it down to the stress I was under. Being 41 at the time then came the fatigue, migraine’s, my brain spinning brain fog and other symptoms and what I thought was a temperature so went to the doctor saying thought it was menopause. He looked at me like I was nuts but ran the blood tests which showed nothing. This went on till this year when I discovered I was pregnant but didn’t have even the time to process the fact. As the following day was told pregnancy wasn’t viable and was in the process of a miscarriage. Fast forward 2nd month no period but know I’m not pregnant. Due to the covid thing I ordered two FSH hormone test (dipstick )online.Which both came back positive for FSH hormone. So I now know for certain that I am starting perimenopause stage and now take a multi supplement on top to help elevate some of my symptoms but feel a lot better I know what is actually happening to my body now.
Angie5 years ago
I am 49 and had no clue why my body, emotions, thoughts were all over the place - I seriously thought I was losing my mind. Now I’ve been paying closer attention to how I feel and listen to my body each day. Reading posts from people in their late 30’s early 40’s who have been experiencing symptoms I have had for years...why didn’t I ask questions years ago ?
Amanda5 years ago
I had a hysterectomy when I was 32, my periods had become so heavy and painful that after several failed procedures they decided that a hysterectomy was the way forward.Due to my age they left my ovaries so as not to throw me into full menopause so young. I had my children very young, three by the age of twenty one so to fair after the recover, which twenty seven years ago took a little longer ( key hole was rare then!) I embraced my new found freedom of no periods. Yay! I still would get monthly cramps from my ovaries but nothing like they were before the hysterectomy. I did not regret it one bit. There did however, seem to be a difference of opinion by doctors of exactly when my ovaries would stop working all together, I’ve always felt that it’s been the last six years or so that I have noticed your classic menopause symptoms... hot flushes and mood swings, I never realised that there was such a thing called peri menopause and the havoc it wrecks on you! and I have indeed experienced a lot of the symptoms mentioned on Caria. This is such an amazing app and I must! tell my three daughters aged 41,39 and 37 all about it. You’ve probably worked out that I am 59 now and would like to think I’m nearing the end of the flushes etc.. until then though I will check in to read all the latest discussions, i wish it was available when I was in my late twenty’s early thirties! Thank you lovelies for sharing your experience’s. Oh and stay safe in these challenging times...sorry if I’ve gone on a bit?xx
Kelly5 years ago
I had no idea what was wrong with me
Abena5 years ago
My first symptom was loss of libido. It was like knowing you love sweets & chocolates, remembering how they taste but when you eat one it hurts you mouth because you no longer salivate (vaginal dryness); you can’t taste it because you’ve lost your sense of taste. It’s like a punishment, loosing a pleasure. Hubby did not understand and I have no vocabulary for what I was experiencing. It was the GP nurse when giving me a smear test, who commented on how sore I was - without words from me, she just knew and told me that I was peri menopausal. I cried. I wasn’t going mad. I wish that we as women going into our 40/50s Will be informed much much earlier about what our bodies are about to do to us!! really would’ve helped me to feel in control.
Colleen5 years ago
I agree, i wish my mother would have actually told me what i was going to go through but she didn’t and I’ve felt like something was really wrong with me. I have four daughters that are in their 20’s and 30’s I’m going to take them to lunch and let them know what to expect when they start going through the change.
Rachel5 years ago
Il be honest my symptoms have been going on for a while . One of my very first were very heavy long periods then the start of tinnitus which drove me to despair. I had a huge amount of trauma in my life. I had a divorce , my son was in an induced coma ( he is ok now ) then my wonderful brother took his own life. I was so angry and alone and all sorts of emotions unfolded and I know I was having symptoms then but they were intertwined with my sadness. My physical symptoms started a couple of years ago digestive problems joint aches throat weirdness tingling feelings weird sensations brain fog then the start of lockdown the night sweats and hot flushes. What a journey it’s been a huge learning curve for me. There still isn’t enough done for women going through this time in life it’s still very neglected. I would love to study the menopause more and give other women reassurance and support because it’s just not out there. Before I went through it myself il be totally honest I didn’t realise the effect it could have on myself but some of the heartbreaking stories I’ve read particularly about mental health are overwhelming. I always think reassurance and understanding goes a very long way.
Dino20175 years ago
Hi your story mirrors mine. Extreme trauma. Car accident, husband diagnosed with GBM brain tumour, mum died , dog aged 17 died all in short period. Then symptoms started aged 52 pushed me over edge and ended up in hospital which scared me to death adding to trauma as doctors said it was 80% trauma 20% menopause! It’s all been so confusing x
Maria5 years ago
I just thought I was old. Got to the point that I felt like I was 80 (literally) - it just felt so extreme. Didn’t really have the menopause symptoms I’d heard most about - thought I was probably peri, but thought the menopause was a doddle compared to the aging! ???. Having looked into it now I realise that I’ve probably had symptoms for years; anxiety, brain fog, memory lapses, fatigue, joint & muscle pain.
Jenn5 years ago
The missed periods and hot flashes were my first signs but I was in my late 30’s and my OB kept telling me I was too young. I’m still learning/finding new symptoms that are related to menopause....such as the stuffy nose (I keep thinking it’s allergies), insomnia, feeling lightheaded....so many symptoms that have me going crazy...but thankful to know it’s related to menopause.
Sandra4 years ago
I was experiencing many of the symptoms you mentioned and are mentioned in many of the posts. I noticed my symptoms coming on around the age of 41. I went to my OB/DR and she quickly put things into a different perspective which helped me considerably, she herself started with peri menopause at age 37 and was done with her period by age 42. She and her mom experienced intense symptoms. I left her office feeling much relief knowing that it was more common and that I was not alone.
alliemich5 years ago
I just recently started thinking it could be perimenopause but have an appt in two weeks with my ob and we will see! lately I have been worried about early dementia because I forget names and words [and even my kids ages!] I say things backwards or think I say things differently than what is heard. It’s like I almost stutter a bit? After googling like mad over the Christmas break about memory problems and verbal memory and mental math or comprehension issues, I found some sites referencing perimenopause. Now looking back I see symptoms of perimenopause I have ignored or thought was something else like chronic daily headaches for months, 20 / 24 / 48 day cycles, increasing anxiety and panic attacks, heart palpitations, hair loss, waking in early am and anxiety and can’t fall back asleep, sometimes wake up hot and I am almost always cold, suddenly upset and cry over little things, no sex drive and painful sex, quick to get frustrated or angry, almost everything on the chart. The only thing I don’t have is fatigue and night sweats. I still have good energy thankfully. I will be 46 in February. I know I have hormone issues. I had 4 miscarriages before my only successful pregnancy and had months in early adulthood of no periods. I am very anxious to see my ob in a couple of weeks and get some advice!
Roz5 years ago
I first noticed when I started having panic attacks and anxiety out of no where which scared the hell out of me that I actually called for an ambulance, I constantly have sore breast and bad acid reflux, my periods are shorter and painful. I can deal with most of the symptoms but not the panic attacks as I feel unsafe if that makes sense?
Summer5 years ago
I can relate. The panic and anxiety have been my worst symptoms by far! They began when I started this journey and have persisted through for the last 3 years! I can’t seem to handle any stress or I get a panic attack! Lockdown hasn’t helped as I am now basically agrophobic.
Rozreplying to Summer5 years ago
I’m totally in the same boat as you, this lockdown has increased the panic attacks, I know this may sound weird but I have a game on my phone that I play when I feel an attack coming on, it helps to distract my mind ? And I’m not even into games ? sometimes you got to laugh!!
Shannonreplying to Summer2 years ago
Me too!
Set5 years ago
Initially (7 years ago) thought the heat surges were because of jetlag but it continued for months. Then periods starting going crazy (and a good number of near embarrassing moments) and all over the place so then started googling and decided peri it had started Heat surges continued and got pretty aggressive after about 2 years. (Lots of light weight clothing and bedding helped. Also had a fan on all night every night at the side of me for a couple of years which was such a blessing). Spoke to my doctor who put me on anti-depressants - just for the flashes - and they really did take the aggressiveness of them away and made them more manageable. Not a fan of medications but as a short term help I’m accepting them. Also helped with the panicky feelings when the flashes revved up - along with breathing through them (and running to the back door asap to stand in the cold air...?) First herbal remedy I took was black cohosh and that worked for about 3 months but then stopped Tried all sorts of other herbal remedies but none really worked for me Sleeping over the last 10 years has been totally yak with at one point (7 or so years in) awake every other hour for probably a year then settled and has been much better the last year. Early on I accepted that my body was telling me that it mustn’t have needed it any other way so just accepted it which again heloed (instead of worrying about waking up and not getting a good nights sleep) The weight gain was rubbish as well but in first lockdown I signed up to a workout programme which was an absolute game changer (wish I’d discovered it 20 years ago). Also helped with energy levels Thankfully no mood issues but brain fog and that sharpness has definitely taken a nap with memory The dryness started about a year ago when peri left and meno arrived. Expecting it to get worse so probably need to google again..
Moof5 years ago
I first realised I was perimenapausal when I visited the breast consultant with lots of lumps in my breasts. Apparently it’s a common symptom but not one I’d heard of. After that all the brain fog and mood swings made sense - once you know what’s going on it’s much easier to deal with. Unfortunately it coincides with kids becoming teenagers and ageing/dying parents - it’s tough but I’m so glad this conversation is starting x
Lisa5 years ago
My symptoms are headaches and insomnia, I went to my dr and she asked if I had ... symptoms and I said nope, none of those symptoms. Then I went home and googled and found out these two are signs, just not signs experienced by all women.
Nessa5 years ago
Aloha I have had panic attacks, bad anxieties and bad depression since I started my menopause. But no doctor have said that menopause is the cause. I’ve been put on antidepressants for a little while and I’ve seen a psychiatrist but no one said it is my menopause. But yet I have all the symptoms of menopause.
Shannon2 years ago
Me too!
Abenab5 years ago
Later the extreme perfuse sweating - that’s when I really knew that it’s game on ?
Jan5 years ago
I was having panic attacks, massive mood swings including getting angrier than I can ever remember being, poor sleep, poor concentration and brain fog. I went to the dr who said it was stress. It was only when I got hot flushes that I started reading and realised what was happening
Steff5 years ago
I didn’t have a clue until I was crying for no reason severe panic attacks at work and anxiety then came the hot flushes my face would just go tomato red The heat was terrible sitting with a fan The best thing I did was see a female doctor who asked me to think of hrt I did for 2 years then started hrt combined not a miracle cure but definitely helped with flushes and mood swings It’s amazon to see that a lot of you are going through the same thing No idea my leg was hurting because of hrt and the tiredness .
Silky5 years ago
Didn’t know I was in menopause for about 2-3 years. I thought I was getting periods but it was a fibroid that was lodged in my uterine lining that would swell and I would spot sometimes or bleed for 24 hours once a month or several months I thought I was skipping periods. Was constantly anemic had to start getting Iron Infusions. That was enough. I found out from my Doctor that I was already in menopause. But had to get a full hysterectomy and found out I had major cysts on both ovaries and I had a enlarged uterus. Can’t take HRT so I have to do supplements, eat healthy and exercise for the hot flashes. I have a cooling blanket, pillow cases, my fan and ice water beside my bed at night plus my thermal watch I use once I feel one come on. What an experience.
JM5 years ago
The only reason I figured out my symptoms so quickly, despite my drs acting like I was crazy, is because I watched my mother go thru this. She went from being the sweetest mother alive to the devil for about 10 years! So at 38 when I started running hot all the time, had severe mood swings (I’ve cried every single day for so many years I’ve lost count intentionally), vile behavior from those mood swings, and went from sleeping 9 hours a night to 4-5 I knew. I used to tell my brother I was in for it someday. My poor daughter is same way with birth control & refuses to take it for that reason. We are very affected by hormone shifts apparently & not in a good way! Then in March I went down to 2 hours a night & finally told my dr I can’t take anymore. I would fall asleep while moving at my desk. The last 2 years I spent working & trying to keep a job was very trying to say the least. And no one talks about this ? every single one of us Has to go through it, but nobody prepares you? then our medical doctors act like they don’t know what u r talking about and make you feel like you’re going crazy. To not have your suffering recognized is almost a form of torture & not real helpful when you’re going through something like this. and it affects a decade of your life! I’ve ruined relationships permanently because nobody believes me! nobody talks about this. so we’ve really done a number for ourselves I guess by keeping quiet! I don’t understand it
Jessica5 years ago
In my case, I found out through bloodwork and then started to pay more attention to my body. I started noticing hot flashes, mood swings and night sweats.
msmariamb5 years ago
Been having anxiety and sleepless nights and put it down to losing my dad in the Ethiopian airlines crash and then covid hitting. But lockdown has eased and still on edge. The hot flushes I thought were my 38k boobs as they always ran hot. When the insomnia hit and watching the loraine Kelly program on menopause things started to click and I called my Gp. They ran blood tests and now 4 weeks later I’m on an antidepressant to combat the flushes because with my medical history HRT and I won’t work. I’m 4 days in with these meds and it make me fall asleep within an hour of taking them but only dor about 2 hours then I’m up half the night as usual. My average sleep per night is 3.7 hrs. At least Accor to my sleep app which I’ve been using since august. Please tell me it gets better cos right now I’m pulling my hair out. Getting pimples and mood swings and no period for 9 months I thought I was going mad. Does this settle down? Now I’m getting hot again. Gotta go sit in front of the fan again
Colleen5 years ago
I just realized today what I’m actually going through. For the past three days I have been in my bed unable to Sleep because of restless legs, the night sweats have been horrible, the hip and knee pains have been through the roof, and I’ve had absolutely no energy. My husband was ready to take me to the hospital. At first I thought it was my thyroid disease. After talking to my sister in law and downloading this app and reading the stories that are exactly like mine…. I finally have clarity so i can start taking my life back.
Mechee5 years ago
Thank you all for sharing, thank have been feeling all alone on this journey. Panic attacks last for years, health fears never had before, very over weight and never had this before. I use to walk but feel heavy in my body for some reason and can’t figure out why, depression is real and I hate taking medicine for it. I have had to take HRT because nite sweats were all day sweats and my irritability was out of control. I feel ugly I think I look ugly and get mad at myself for not being able to get my old self back.
Liz5 years ago
Basically, it wasn’t until I looked back on my symptom history that I figured out those things had been symptoms. My period was irregular, then rare, then gone. I had night sweats, hot flashes, joint pain, a bit of insomnia, and weight gain. But I was in my early-to-mid 40s and didn’t have time to focus on what was going on, let alone link the symptoms to one another.
Bren4 years ago
Cannabis
Leslie4 years ago
Panic attacks, memory lapses, brain fog, night sweats, chest pain, insomnia, less appetite. Been going on for 2 years, don’t know when it will end! I’m just worried (anxiety) that it will impact my life so heavily ?.
Mummytoone3 years ago
Has the panic attacks and anxiety ease away yet
Parastoo4 years ago
Actually still I hope to get my period? the last three month was my last period and alway it was regular. The last period I had, it was so heavy with my hemoroid which was so painful and I used a Chinies medicine and since then I dont have my period ?
Tree4 years ago
I had panic attacks anxiety weight gain bloating the hot flushes and as I got older the symptoms just became more frequent. I didn’t really connect all these symptoms with the menopause as I had an ablation about 15 years ago and my periods stopped straight away. When I consulted my GP their answer was antidepressants and I have been stuck on these for years. After looking more into the menopausal symptoms I realised the symptoms I’m having are menopausal and not just depression. I am now being weaned off the antidepressants and taking control of the menopause myself.
Eliza4 years ago
I was working on a commercial in Capetown, South Africa, which is nicknamed “Four seasons in a day” for its wildly variable weather conditions. It’s only when I realized that even inside the hotel I was getting cold and hot flashes and waking up soaking my bedsheets that I realized that this wasn’t just SA but likely perimenopause.
LZ4 years ago
My life felt like it was upside down in 2017/2018. I felt like I was ruining everything. I felt so lonely, lost and then crazy angry. So I quit a great job because I just couldn’t cope anymore and needed to figure it all out. I left my husband in the city for a month and took my young son so we could just chill and give him a break from me during a summer (very grateful I could do that). Another friend did the same and joined me with her kids. One night when I couldn’t sleep (about 4am) I googled a bunch of my symptoms, joined noom (I gained 25lbs really quick with no change to my diet) and found an adrenal support vitamin. Thought maybe I was burning candles at both ends for too long and just drained. Then I saw the term “peri menopause”…started researching rage and it was a also a big symptom. Ordered these PM support vitamins and noticed a MAJOR positive change. Booked a gyn appointment and checked hormone levels 2 weeks later. That was all around a year plus. I was also dealing with my father passing, mom moved in and also my 4yr son was diagnosed with ASD. I had no idea which way was up back then. Extremely overwhelmed. Menopause was the last thing I suspected…
Cally4 years ago
I had no idea I was peri menopausel. I thought I was losing my mind and ended up losing my husband. I was prescribed anti depressants for my low mood, I was sent to the bladder clinic for my incontinence, my ears were syringed and I was told I’d have to live with the constant tinnitus, had my eyes tested because of the headaches and then caught Covid. Now every symptom I have is due to long Covid. Headaches, hot flashes, fatigue, joint pain, insomnia, anxiety, brain fog… every step is such a battle.
Mummytoone3 years ago
Do you mind me asking what age you are
Mummytoone3 years ago
Can I ask how old are you
Mummytoone3 years ago
How has any one coped with the panic attacks and anxiety I hate it
Joanne1 year ago
Please is there anyone who can give me some advice. I am 49 yrs old and 4 years ago come November I was fitted with the implant in my arm. This was my 4th time having it fitted as I have had absolutely no problems with it before. But now thinking back I would have been 44 yrs old. Went to well woman clinic got my smear blah blah. But the last 4 yrs I have been a scatty nightmare. Should I have had a test done to see if I was menopausal. I hadn’t had a monthly in 14 months until 3 days ago. But this just seems like a clean out, but WOW has it drained me. I get this implant out in November anyway. But what’s happening I’m lost. All and any advice appreciated thanks
Chuck1 year ago
Suffered hot flushes a lot when my periods ended.
Mia1 year ago
I started noticing an increase in sweat output first. Then I started getting weird periods. I didn’t think much of it at first but then I had my first hot flash and knew what was happening. I ended up having surgery on my armpit last summer because the increased sweat output overworked my sweat glands causing hidradenitis supportiva. Not an experience I want to repeat.
Taunya10 months ago
I didn’t realize my symptoms were perimenopause until my blood pressure read 175/110!!!! When I began to really dive into why it was so high suddenly, I saw it can be linked to perimenopause. Then I began to look at all the symptoms and realized I’ve been in perimenopause for almost two years and I’m 42!!!
Anonymous9 months ago
I wasn’t sure until HRT cured them! My memory was worse than my Moms for years, but I thought it was from the tough Covid years or midlife crisis. 1.5 days into HRT I feel 7 years younger!! Hot flashes let me know it was menopause and the internet has some great resources-search you tube. There are some amazing doctors on there!!
Lacey9 months ago
My symptoms were so sudden and so severe at the age of 44, I had no choice but to go down the rabbit hole. I looked up bipolar, borderline personality, ADHD, anxiety, depression, PMDD. Perimenopause checked all the boxes. I saw 2 female GYN Drs 4x in 3 months- both said that because I was still cycling, even irregularly, I was not a candidate for HRT at my age! At the last visit, she said I could have some low-dose birth control. That’s when I knew I needed to switch doctors. In a fit of RAGE (one of my more prominent symptoms) I used a telehealth service and got approved for estradiol and progesterone. When I was finally able to see my new in person gynecologist she markedly increased my doses and gave me testosterone in addition. She also told me to take B12, magnesium, CoQ10 and D3. It took about five weeks and I was 80% back to normal. The picking fights with my husband is uncontrollable and volatile. I feel terrible for him. I cannot believe that he didn’t divorce me. I realize how lucky I am to have a partner that supports me through this. I don’t say this lightly, but I’m not sure I would still be here without HRT. I’m bawling my eyes out right now reading all this. Realizing that I’m NOT? crazy- that this is apparently normal to varying degrees?!?! WTF?! I don’t feel normal. My brain actually feels like it’s vibrating with all this negative energy. It feels…sick. I hate it. I have good days/hours which keep me and my husband going. I had a tiny bit of depression after my second baby/father dying all in the same year. But other than that, not one single thing. Not a period cramp, no PMS. No mood swings. My period was so regular that I knew what day it was coming almost to the hour. It’s like my body is trying to make up for decades of being nice to me. Paybacks a bitch, almost killed me, it’s still trying.